I do remember why I called it “Pony Leg Girl” though. It had to do with two things my oldest brother told me. First, that I had legs like a Shetland pony. Short and sturdy. I interpreted that as ‘unfeminine and ugly’. Second, he told me that the reason I didn’t have a boyfriend was because I was too intense and intellectually intimidating. That guys just wanted to have fun and not get into all kinds of different issues too deeply. I interpreted that as pure, unadulterated horse shit. However, as you can see, the thoughts stayed with me.
I think I was trying to exorcise some of these stupid thoughts by creating this painting, guessing that I’d be pretty enough for a boy to be interested in me if all the intense and intellectually intimidating parts of my mind could be pulled out and my unfeminine and ugly body parts cut off. In other words, be anything or anyone but my true self. Again, pure, unadulterated horse shit.